If you notice yourself carefully then you will find that our behaviors have some patterns for some situations. Just try to recall few of happenings of your daily life, like when you feel happy, when you feel sad, which are the situations when you feel yourself hanging back or afraid, when you feel angered. Note down all of these situations and categorize them. Like write down all situations in which you feel happy in one section, in other section you write all situations in which you feel bad, in another section you can write down everything which makes you afraid or hang yourself back. Also write down the situations when you feel angered. You can narrow down your category list according to you.
Now your mind is aware about these situations, as you have written all of the situations on the paper. If you notice carefully then you will find that few of the situations in this list are similar and causing similar effects on you. Try to figure out the situations which you can avoid or have better control with. Think on these and try to find out the solutions or the way how you can deal better with these. So next time, when you face the situation in practical life, then try to remember the solution or plan which you had. Initially it will be little difficult to execute your plan but once you become habitual then your mind will start automatically reacting in that way and this will give you better result or at least your life will become little easy. This is because you have learnt how to deal with a situation on which earlier you did not had control.
Life is not easy for many but we can have better control on it by knowing our behaviors. The good news is that we can learn how to control. One needs to understand his behaviors first. This will increase the self-awareness and self-control. So keep your observing behavior mod on as a background process in your life without affecting the actual pace of life. This will dramatically improve your life and life style. Happy Observing